Someday Far Away

Someday far away, someone will look at you in a way your heart has yearned for forever. But they won’t just see you. They will see the tiny hands holding onto each of your legs. They will see the version of you that unravels when the sun goes down. They won’t just see you, they will love you.

They will love you with such a steady presence that you never have to question it. They will show you what it means to be valued, appreciated, and worthy. Someday far away, you will meet the person who makes you feel more like yourself and never less than. They will fall in love with you, not for what you can give them, but for all that you are.

Every stretch mark. Every thigh dimple. Every worry. Every tear. They will love the things you’ve spent years trying to hide.

They will love the way you can’t help but dance in the kitchen in your socks to your favorite song. They will love that even in a happy relationship, you still belt breakup songs at the top of your lungs just to stay awake on a late drive home. They will love your desire to try everything good on the face of the planet at least once. They won’t make fun of you for working late because you love what you do. They will support your passions and never make you apologize for talking too much.

They will drive you to a hike they researched just to watch the sunset, then take photos of the stars. They will sit in the quiet with you when you can’t find the words and patiently wait until you can. They will love you through your flaws and insecurities and help you gently take off the makeup of your emotions. They won’t just want what’s on the surface, they will want what lies beneath.

Someday far away, you won’t have to defend yourself. They won’t judge you, they will want to learn you. They will want to know every little thing they can do to make you feel special. They will wake up early with the kettle boiling, kiss your forehead awake, have the kids ready for school, your gym bag packed, and breakfast waiting on the counter. They will set up your favorite theater snacks for an indoor movie night. They will create scavenger hunts for gifts when it isn’t even a holiday.

They will do all of this because you know firsthand that kind of love exists. It’s the kind of love you gave away much too soon.

So maybe while you wait, instead of letting impatience dampen your days, don’t worry so much about someday far away. Give yourself the same love you have poured into others.

You don’t have to wait to love yourself. But what does that even mean?

It’s taken me my whole life to start figuring it out. Loving myself was never something I was good at, yet loving others always felt easy. It’s effortless to look at my best friend and think she is absolutely perfect, flaws and all, because I don’t see them. The things she criticizes about herself are beautiful to me. Every mistake she makes only makes her stronger for having overcome it.

I’ve always loved this way. I love hard. I see the best in people. I excuse things others would find unforgivable. As time goes on, I still love deeply, but now I love with intention.

And that’s what I want to challenge you to do today, as I challenge myself. It’s a daily battle and I’m sure it always will be. But if every day we choose to love ourselves the way someone else in our life loves us, maybe that’s one step closer to actually believing it someday.

Make a list of the things that drive you crazy about yourself and hand it to someone who wouldn’t want a world without you in it. See what they say. Or even better, make that list and work on it. I’ll be right there with you.

You don’t have to wait for someday far away. That day will come.

In the meantime, love the version of you that isn’t just one person, but three. Love the mom who sometimes unravels when the sun goes down. Love yourself stronger than you ever loved someone who took it for granted, and this time, give that love the appreciation it deserves.

See yourself as worthy. Value yourself more than you ever thought possible. Fall in love with yourself for all that you are. For your discipline. For your parenting. For your drive. For your curious, wondering mind.

Love every stretch mark. Every thigh dimple. Every tear. Love yourself through the phases of life you never imagined you’d walk through. Love your body like you dreamed of this body your whole life. Treat it like today matters.

Dance alone in the kitchen in your socks. Belt those breakup songs down the highway. Work late because you’re excited to finish the project. Go to the gym to test your limits and make yourself proud. Plan the hike that puts you in the perfect spot for sunset and star photos. Sit in the silence when you can’t find the words, then write them.

Have the kettle boiling for yourself. Pack the kids’ stuff. Leave a sticky note of encouragement on your gym bag. Set up your favorite snacks and get cozy with your favorite chick flick. Do the work, even in the dark, so the woman in the light can look back and say, you got her here.

Don’t dim your light. Ignite it. Let it burn so brightly that it becomes harder and harder for anyone to blow it out.

And someday far away, you’ll meet someone whose fire burns just as bright for you. And when that day comes, you won’t complete each other, you’ll complement each other. Two whole people, standing side by side. Your fires won’t compete or consume; they will warm, steady, and strengthen one another. You’ll know how to tend your own flame, and they’ll know how to protect theirs, and together you’ll create something that doesn’t burn out but burns brighter. Not because you needed saving, but because you both chose to show up, fully lit, fully alive, and willing to keep the fire going.

Thank you for being here,

Kaitlyn